I wanted to pass along a great article from Inc Magazine with Tony Robbins on the fulfillment in life. In my practice, I get to work with many individuals who have reached financial success or even relationship success but still feel empty inside or lacking something more. As I have mentioned many times, it is not the end result that brings ultimate joy, rather it is the process and what you learn along the way. Do you become a better person? Does it feel good to help and provide for other people? In my experience, people become more fulfilled when they are making progress (even small growth). Just give more, do more and learn more. When you shift the focus from yourself and understand you are here and are connected to everyone around you, life takes on a new dimension. Be thankful you have a chance to contribute and make an impact in this world. That is true joy and fulfillment. As I say to my kids every day: always work hard, add value, help other people and just smile and have some fun. Enjoy the article below.
Why Success Without Fulfillment Is the Ultimate Failure
Tony Robbins believes that success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure. Most people believe that when they reach a certain point in their careers, that they will instantly become fulfilled. You know what I’m talking about, as it can take the form of any of the following:
- When I sell my business for millions of dollars …
- When I land that next multi-million dollar sale …
- As soon as I build that next game changing technology component …
- Once I receive my next round of funding …
- When I have $XX million in the bank …
So why are so many successful entrepreneurs depressed? I can speak from personal experience here. I distinctly remembering going to St. Lucia with my wife and children and thinking to myself, “Is this all there is?” I was feeling depressed — ON VACATION! All because I had reached several of my goals and the expectations of how I would feel when I got there simply weren’t there.
As entrepreneurs, we’re achievers! Every time we achieve something, we systematically move the goal post even further. What we don’t do is stop and celebrate our wins and acknowledge our accomplishments. The bottom line is that if you can’t be happy with who you are and can’t be satisfied with what you have accomplished, then this really is the ultimate failure, isn’t it?
Fulfillment is About Gratitude, Celebration and Contribution
What is even more crazy is just how easy it is to be fulfilled. And I don’t mean sometime in the future when you achieve a certain goal. I mean right now. If you’re feeling down about yourself or your accomplishments, then listen up. We’re going to set you on a course to fulfillment right now in three easy steps courtesy of Tony Robbins:
- Begin each day with gratitude. This is by far the most important step and it takes only 5 minutes a day. Tomorrow when you wake up, don’t reach for your phone or computer. Instead, spend 5 minutes meditating on at least 3 things you’re truly grateful for. This can be people, events, goals accomplished, and especially the extremely simple things that are all around you such as nature, the weather, your good health, etc. As soon as you ask yourself, “What am I truly grateful for?” you’ll be surprised what floods into your mind. Enjoy these 10 minutes and make it a ritual every day. The more grateful you are, the happier you become and the more fulfilled you will feel.
- Next, Celebrate Your Future Accomplishments. As an entrepreneur, you hardly ever give yourself a pat on the back. Admit it! When was the last time you stopped and really celebrated any milestone you achieved? So as part of your morning ritual, add another 5 minutes to celebrate one thing you’ve accomplished and 2 things you know you’re going to accomplish (just as though it already happened). Get it in your body just how awesome you are. Physically jump up and down raise your hands over your head. If you’re alone, yell “YES!” really loud. If you don’t want to wake up your family, do it quietly but with tons of enthusiasm. This may sounds silly, but until you get body connected to your accomplishments you’re going to feel unfulfilled.
- And Finally, Find a Way to Give Generously. Regardless of where you are in your career, you are full of abundance and it is your responsibility to give of yourself. This can be in the form of time, money or anyway that feels right for you. Find a cause you truly care about and give your time, money and ideally both. The act of contribution will remind you of just how successful and fortunate you really are. And giving is addictive. Once you shift from a model of scarcity to one of abundance, you will feel a flood of fulfillment.
That’s it. Are there more ways to feel fulfilled? You bet, but I’ve found these three to do the trick. Every time I start to get down on myself, I use these tools to stop beating myself up and instead remember just how successful and fortunate I already am. I give gratitude for what I have, I celebrate my future wins (even if I was expecting them to happen sooner), and I give generously to the causes I care deeply about. This is a winning formula for fulfillment and keeps me excited for the incredible journey I’m on. I encourage you to start this 10 minute a day exercise as it will instantly improve your level of fulfillment.